A recent news report reinforces the folly of spending large sums of money on heated court battles in favour of a non-confrontational, less stressful and more cost-effective solution.

A High Court judge has lambasted an estranged couple who supply luxury bathrobes and towels to top hotels for racking up a “crazy” £1.5m legal bill in wrangling over their £10m assets. Having spent 15% of their wealth on the bitter battle, Mr Justice Holman has urged them to negotiate.

As prominent supporters of Resolution  which works to resolve family disputes constructively, at Jones Myers we encourage our clients to co-operate over dividing their assets and securing the future of their children.

In our extensive experience, protracted court battles (litigation) over differences can result in the parties and their advisors losing sight of what they are trying to achieve.

We help ex-spouses to avoid a protracted, expensive and stressful court process through three tried and proven processes. The first is collaboration, which seeks to achieve a respectful and dignified resolution, putting any children at the heart of the process and keeping the details private.

We also recommend mediation where a mediator facilitates confidential and voluntary discussions between the parties and which usually culminates in a Memorandum of Understanding which records the agreement reached.

As a last resort, the third process which also avoids the court route is arbitration where an arbitrator, an experienced family lawyer, works with couples to reach a divorce settlement.  Similar to a judge, they collect relevant facts and evidence and base their decision on this evidence – taking into account the views of both parties. The Award is final and binding in both parties.

Adopting an inflexible stance where hard-core financial gain, hostility and prolonged battles become all-consuming will inevitably lead to heartache, guilt and regret for many years to come.

At Jones Myers we understand that every case is unique and we consistently strive for the right solution for every client.

We know only too well the impact that relationship and family issues can have on people’s lives which is why our understanding, expertise and reputation unpins everything we do.

For more information about collaboration, mediation, arbitration or any aspect of family law call Jones Myers on 0113 246 0055. Our highly experienced team includes founder Peter Jones, one of the UK’s top divorce lawyers and mediators and the first qualified arbitrator in Leeds and Norman Taylor who pioneered collaborative law in Yorkshire. You can also tweet us @helpwithdivorce

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The rise in parental child abductions – where a mum or dad snatches their own child – continues unabated.

Last year the Foreign Office dealt with nearly 500 cases – almost double the figure in 2005 –  and, according to a recent BBC programme, a British child is abducted and taken abroad by a parent, on average, every day.

Resolution, the organisation representing collaborative family lawyers, is addressing the growing need for the legal profession to be better informed and better able to help clients facing family law cases abroad. Its recent conference covered topics including how to spot and avoid abduction along with dealing with financial claims and maintenance after an overseas’ divorce.

International relationships and marriages are only part of the story behind the rise in abductions. Country specific family law legislation means that any issue relating to children can be challenging – with some parents prepared to take desperate measures. Even relocation abroad for work can push a parent into taking drastic actions to keep their child if their marriage breaks down.

The issue has been further catapulted into the media spotlight after two mothers calling themselves ‘Expat Stuck Mums’ launched a campaign aimed at mums and dads who find themselves trapped in a foreign country because the other parent forbids them to leave.

Like many people, these two women were unaware that children are automatically under a foreign jurisdiction when they move abroad because the new country becomes their ‘habitual residence’.

British courts have no say over what happens to the child and having British passports does not give either parent the right to take their children back to live in the UK without the consent of the other parent.

If there is a dispute about taking a child out of a country then requests must be settled by the family court in that jurisdiction. Whereas in the UK complex family cases are heard in a higher court, in many foreign countries a case may be heard by an inexperienced judge.

The Expat Stuck Mums are frustrated because they can ill afford to be stuck on foreign soil, often without any income and sometimes for years – yet risk prosecution if they abduct their children. They say that returning to the UK alone to fight for your child’s return isn’t an option as this could imply that you have abandoned your offspring.

As specialists in all matters relating to children, Jones Myers has first-hand experience of helping parents with returning their children to the UK. Here are some of our tips for dealing with international child custody issues:

1. Be absolutely certain that a move overseas is right for you and your family. Even a trial or short term move means that your children’s future will be decided by the laws of that host country
2. If you are unhappy abroad and want to return to the UK then try to negotiate with your child’s father or mother as a first step
3. Never be tempted to take the law into your own hands. If you abduct your child then your credibility as a parent will be irretrievably damaged – particularly if you have ignored a court order. You could also face a jail sentence
4. If you are concerned that the other parent could flee with your children then keep their passports safe – you could lodge them with a solicitor. You can also ask the Passport Agency in the UK to block the child’s mother or father from applying for a new passport
5. Notify schools, child minders and even friends, about who is allowed to collect your child
6. Contact Reunite, the UK’s International Child Abduction Charity, which operates a 24 hour emergency helpline -(0)116 255 6234
7. If you receive a threat of child abduction, or if your child has been abducted, then contact the local police at once. They will alert airports and ferry terminals. Photos of your child, the other parents and details of any destination or person they could be heading to, will be helpful
8. Seek legal advice immediately.

If you have any concerns about parental child abduction or any matter relating to children and divorce then please call us on 0113 246 0055, leave us a comment below or drop us an e-mail. You can follow us on Twitter at @helpwithdivorce

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As an advocate of collaborative approaches to separation and divorce I was encouraged to see Resolution’s campaigning debated in the House of Lords.

As a long standing member of Resolution, the organisation representing lawyers who believe in non-confrontational, constructive solutions to all family matters, I feel optimistic that perhaps ministers are listening to our messages in a year that has seen unprecedented changes in our family courts.

Divorce and separation continues to be a painful, protracted process, particularly for children – as highlighted by the latest research findings from Resolution.

Launched to coincide with Family Dispute Resolution Week, the research on the impact of divorce on young people shows that the fallout of divorce can be wide reaching and damaging for many years. Every year around 100,000 children under 16 see their married parents break up – a statistic which does not include youngsters whose parents live together.

In the survey of 14 – 22 year olds whose parents have separated, many said that their GCSE and A-Level results suffered and that they were forced to choose sides in their parents’ break-up. One in five young people “didn’t get the exam results” they were hoping for with the majority (65%) saying it was their GCSE exam results that suffered. And one in 10 said that they found themselves in more trouble at school.

As well as affecting exam results, young people surveyed said that their parents’ separation impacted on their health – with one in six saying they took up drinking alcohol.

These findings emphasise the importance of parents using more constructive methods to separate in order to lessen the most stressful elements of a break-up, ensuring the best outcomes for both them and their children.

Resolution chair Jo Edwards, commented: “I’m not for a second suggesting that people should not break-up ‘for the sake of the kids’. Children’s wellbeing often improves markedly after a break-up when they’re not witnessing day-in day-out the trauma of their parents’ relationship breaking down slowly. It’s not anyone’s job to judge the merits of any given relationship. But the process of the break-up can and should often be managed much better.

“If this survey tells us anything it’s that separating couples have a duty to their children to reduce the stress of separation. That’s precisely why over recent years, different types of dispute resolution have developed which are designed specifically to reduce conflict and encourage collaboration.

“We need to start busting the Hollywood myth that the only way to settle a break-up is to have your day in court. For some couples it is the best option but for many it is not. For children a parental break-up is never easy but parents owe it to their children to find the method of separation that will work best for the whole family.”

If government is truly committed to putting children at the heart of changes to family courts, I hope that those at highest level continue to listen to and consult with Resolution and its 6,500 members who are committed to considering the needs of the whole family.

To find out more about collaborative family lawyers, or do you have any questions about separation or divorce, please e-mail us. You can follow us on Twitter @helpwithdivorce

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The lack of Legal Aid for most family law matters means that couples now have to fund their own divorces. This has left unprecedented numbers of people representing themselves in family courts, even in complex cases.

We have written previously about our concerns that public funding cuts are leading to a two tier family law system.  Sound, professional support to guide couples through their separation and help them to resolve financial and children’s matters, should not be the preserve of the very rich and should be accessible and affordable for those who need it.

Divorce is a ‘distress purchase’ – that is an expense you haven’t budgeted for. So how do you fund a solicitor and the expenses associated with the process?  Here are five options which we recommend you discuss with your lawyer at a first meeting as some of these may not be appropriate or available:

1. Use savings or investments

If you have savings they may not be earning much interest so you could use them to pay for legal advice. You could also cash in ISAs or other investments; however do take independent financial advice regarding any such action and any potential tax consequences. If savings or investments are in joint names you may be able to reach agreement that certain funds be set aside to cover each party’s legal costs.

2. Find a firm that specialises in litigation funding

There are litigation funding firms throughout the UK who offer credit schemes to fund the cost of a lawyer and all costs associated with the divorce. If you don’t have savings, are unable to borrow the money from another source, or have a low credit score, then this could be an option – although rates of interest are likely to be on the high side. You can find out details from us or from an independent financial adviser (IFA). Resolution, the association that represents 6,500 collaborative family lawyers nationally, including Jones Myers, has recently launched an online option with one such company.

3. Use a Sears Tooth Agreement

Under a Sears Tooth Agreement you sign a deed to assign your financial settlement to your solicitor, who takes out their costs – including any court fees, third party costs and related expenses – before you receive your capital. This is not a popular option with law firms because of the potential risks involved because if you don’t receive the expected settlement they could be out of pocket.

4. Draw on loans and credit cards

A bank loan with a competitive interest rate can be an effective way to fund legal costs. However, a bank will check your credit rating and will want assurance that you can meet the monthly payments.  Funding your divorce on your credit card will incur high interest rates if you make minimum monthly payments – although this could be a solution in the short term or as a last resort. Some credit card companies offer 0% interest for six or nine months which is worth considering if a financial settlement is likely to be agreed in the same timescale as the interest free period.

5. Ask your family 

Although you may see turning to your nearest and dearest as a last resort because you are concerned about burdening them, a family member may be willing to help out with a loan until you receive your financial settlement. Be realistic and upfront about what you want – if you need £2,000 than say so at the outset, and spell out in writing that it is a loan and how – and when – you will pay them back.

You can keep costs down if you and your ex are both prepared to take a non-confrontational approach to your break-up.  Using collaborative lawyers will avoid court battles and the lawyers will steer you through your separation and divorce, helping you to reach agreements that suit you both.

If you have any concerns or questions about how to fund your divorce call us on 0113 246 0055, leave us a comment below or drop us an e-mail. You can also follow us on Twitter: @helpwithdivorce.

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