Neurodivergency – what is it – and does it affect divorce?
By Sarah Barr-Young, Head of Jones Myers Financial Remedies Department in Harrogate
Over 15 per cent of the UK population – which equates to one in seven people – are neurodivergent, which means their brains work in different ways.
Neurodivergency is not a medical condition or a disorder, but a term to describe differences in how the brain is wired. Neurodivergent people have alternative thinking styles which include dyslexia, developmental co-ordination disorder (dyspraxia), dyscalculia (which affects mathematical skills) , autism, Tourette’s and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).
How does neurodivergency affect relationship breakdown?
Divorce and separation is emotionally difficult for any separating couple. For neurodivergent people, who see the world differently, the challenges are even harder to navigate. Their different communication styles can lead to misunderstandings in communication, triggering higher levels of anxiety, rejection and depression.
Many tend to feel paralyzed and overwhelmed at the prospect of dealing with the unknown and working with strangers – whether they be family lawyers, mediators or counsellors -through the divorce process.
Which specific areas of divorce do neurodivergent people find particularly difficult?
Many struggle with working through the process of financial disclosure, which requires a complete and accurate account of their financial situation including assets, income and debts.
Concerns separating couples face over finances and living accommodation after a break up can be particularly acute for neurodivergent people, especially parents who are worried how divorce will affect their relationship with their children.
How does divorce impact on neurodivergent children?
Children of all ages are susceptible to the anxieties of divorce and separation which can be made worse by events such as birthdays, school holidays, Mother’s Day, and Father’s Day.
For neurodivergent children, the turmoil of disruptive daily patterns and splitting their time between two households can heighten a sense of insecurity and result in withdrawal.
What do family lawyers need to do differently to help neurodivergent clients?
It is a given that family lawyers have a duty to understand their clients’ needs in every aspect of family law.
When guiding and advising neurodivergent clients it is vital that family lawyers can establish whether a client is neurodivergent. Understanding the complexities, nuances and triggers associated with neurodivergency is essential to effective communication with between a lawyer and a neurodivergent client to enable them together to achieve an outcome that meets their particular needs. Identifying with neurodivergency also enables family lawyers to signpost clients to other relevant professionals who can guide them.
While The Family Justice Council (FJC), a body which monitors the effectiveness of the Family Justice System, says a more inclusive system which meets the needs of neurodivergence is needed, there is still a long way to go in achieving this.
Sir Andrew McFarlane, President of the Family Division, rightly says that failure to recognise and accommodate neurodivergence results in parties to court proceedings, witnesses, and children being unable to participate fully in court cases. A proper understanding of neurodivergence would lead to better participation and more effective justice.
Like all our clients, neurodivergent clients deserve the best possible support and understanding. As a family lawyer I fervently hope that we can improve our ability to understand and guide them by collaborating and adopting best practice in this critical and sensitive area.
For queries on divorce, separation or any aspect of family law, call 0113 246 0055 (Leeds) 01423 276104 (Harrogate), 01904 202550 (York). Visit www.jonesmyers.co.uk, info@jonesmyers.co.uk or tweet @helpwithdivorce.
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